Marriage has been likened to that fortified city where those who are already inside are looking for the easiest way out and the ones outside can’t wait to go in. With a recent government study revealing that most first time couples are breaking up within the first 20 years of marriage, we can only conclude that not all relationships out there are beds of roses. Nevertheless, there are many happy couples out there who have managed to avoid break ups or divorce. These are the ones who have understood that the splendor of roses cannot be realized without the prickly thorns beneath the alluring petals.
We all agree that bringing two hearts together (bred in different set ups and lifestyles) and having them begin to chase one dream for the rest of their lives requires commitment. It takes something greater than the guy’s ability to give an irresistible diamond ring or a woman who’s ready to say yes. And there is nothing wrong in proposing with a gorgeous ring. Who would hate to do it with an all-diamond ring, if they can afford it?
Tolerance is one virtue that helps successful couples weather away most of the obstacles that stand in the way of many relationships. We all make mistakes and nobody should expect his or her spouse to be perfect.If your boyfriend, husband, girlfriend or wife acts below your expectations then it’s important to remember that they are doing so because they are not perfect.
Show them their offenses with love and an open heart to allow them a second chance. You never know whether you’ll be the one pleading for their understanding the following day. It happens all the time, simply because we are humans. However, being tolerant is not synonymous with deliberately offending your partner. And since you want to see your relationship move to the next level then you don’t want to keep on offending them.
Letting go and Choosing not to Cling to ego Helps Couples Avoid Break Ups
Letting go and being selfless is a key that when used well in your relationship will indeed open many doorways towards the bliss and even help you avoid break ups. You don’t have to be in the wrong to seek his or her forgiveness. There is no need of creating a stalemate just because you want to justify your position.
If he or she can’t see your point, even after trying to explain your innocence, it’s only wise to swallow your ego, ask for forgiveness and move on. Why should an issue you can avoid by a simple “sorry” cause one or both of you to withdraw from each other or even resort to silence treatment? Marital problems and various relationship syndromes that couples go through cannot be overcome where self-centeredness is allowed to thrive
Improve your Communication Skills
This will take your relationship a long way in avoiding break ups. Developing communication skills helps couples to easily walk together towards their dreams. Relationships are about team mates working together towards a common purpose, which cannot be achieved without the players being skillfully articulate in what they want as their end results.
Imagine a rally driver choosing to team up with a navigator who keeps on giving wrong directions or arguing all the time. You agree with me that such a team can never win any race – unless all their competitors have similar or worse problems.
Trust your spouse
Trusting your boyfriend or girlfriend is another simple, yet important thing wise couples use to avoid break ups. You can’t be with your partner all the time and trusting each other will help you to be at peace even when they are miles away from you.
I’m not trying to suggest that you should sit back and be less concerned about where he or she had been the whole weekend. I’m talking about that needless suspicion that makes spouses stalk each other, fearing that they are being cheated on – even when there is no known trait to suggest the same.
Giving him or her Space to Grow Helps Couples Avoid Break Ups
Giving space to each other is an amazing secret that acts as a strong pillar for supporting your marriage or relationship. Growing up involves making mistakes, miscalculations and can be a very nerve-racking stage. Just like a kid who’s learning how to walk staggers, falls and even hurts himself before he can eventually make the first step, your spouse needs space to make mistakes.
Instead of trying to micromanage them in every aspect, share responsibilities and let them make their independent choices. If they succeed you’ll share in their victory. If they lose you’ll you share in their philosophy. Both ways you don’t lose and more importantly you’ll have a happy life together.