Breaking up from a relationship is a traumatizing experience. It’s one low moment that dating partners want as much as possible to avoid. However if it does happen it’s always good to recollect yourself and move forward with life. Most people make damning mistakes after breaking up and end up regretting in most of their lives. Here are some of the things to avoid after breaking up with your girlfriend or boyfriend.
1. Not learning from the previous mistakes.
People are not drawn together by chance. There are unique virtues that make dating couples feel attracted to each other. It’s true that nobody is perfect. But there have to be those positive values in your dating partner that keep your relationship going. Their absence stalls relationships making most relationships either break up or live under strains. If you get to a break up, it’s important to use the whole situation as a learning platform to help you not to repeat your mistakes in the future
2. Defending yourself.
I’m aware that you may not have deserved the humiliating moment of being left by a girlfriend or a boyfriend of your dreams. But if it has happened, you don’t want to live in wishes. Some people become so defensive, posting on their ex’s facebook wall or reaching all his or her friends to justify their side of the story. But while this might make you release your resentments, it will hurt you most and most likely end up fueling unnecessary war of words.
3. Dwell on tricks to bring your ex back.
Upon breaking up with their ex, many people make mistakes of innovating one trick after another to try and win their ex back. But this turns to be frustrating and a waste of time they should use to heal the wounds they’ve incurred on losing the previous relationships. As you run up and down trying to stalk your ex, always checking in at the lovers’ coffee joints, romance and leisure hotels, or a shopping malls he or she loves, you are likely to be adding unnecessary pain to your already broken heart. Remember your ex is moving on with his or her life.
4. Initiating a new relationship in a hurry.
Many people often make this mistake after breaking up. One reason that leads them to do this is to want to prove a point to their ex. They want to show them that they can find a new lover immediately. Unfortunately, by doing this you’ll end up trying to love someone else you are not ready for.
5. Withdrawal from friends or family.
Breaking up with your boyfriend or girlfriend may make you develop self pity and sometimes you may feel like you want to stay away from friends and family, especially if they had known the steps you and your ex had taken in your relationship. But on the other hand this is the time you need your friends, family members or the good company of your colleagues most. High levels of sadness and hopelessness can lead to depression. I’m sure you don’t want to get there.
6. Ignoring to seek counsel.
Some break ups have very devastating effects. Should you feel that the pain of losing a relationship through a break up is affecting your daily activities, you may want to consider seeking counsel from your local church minister or a professional counselor.